“Emotions are a critical source of information for learning,” Joseph Ledoux.
Our emotions have the ability to offer us a lot of insight about ourselves; and the more we know about ourselves, the easier it can be to navigate this crazy thing called life! Because of the importance of knowing, understanding, and responding to our emotions, having a high emotional intelligence can be life-changing!
You may be asking, what in the world is emotional intelligence and why do I need it? Or maybe you’re like I was, thinking that you are supremely self-aware but actually clueless! So let’s get into it, shall we?
Emotional Intelligence (noun)
The capacity to be aware of, control, and express one’s emotions, and to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically.
I’m sure throughout your life you’ve realized that some people are more emotionally intelligent than others. But how do we measure how emotionally intelligent one is? Our emotional intelligence is actually made up of our components: self-awareness, self-regulation, social awareness, and relationship management.
If we look at these four components we know that we should be striving to be conscious of who we are, why we are that way, what we want, etc. We must also be able to practice self-control, acting outside of just our emotions. Also, we should be willing and able to take perspective and practice empathy. Lastly, we should use all of our information from being socially and self-aware, then use it to manage our interactions with others well.
By doing all of these things well you will increase your quality of life in nearly every way! Having a higher emotional intelligence typically goes hand-and-hand with increased mental wellness, less stress, stronger relationships, and a healthier physical state, among other things. It doesn’t stop there though! You can take your emotional intelligence into your workplace to positively impact your environment, your motivation, your work relationships, and so on.
As Peter Diaz puts it, “when you practice emotional intelligence in leadership, you will be able to stay calm in stressful situations, communicate strategically in times of conflict and show empathy to employees.”
Think about it, have you ever seen the motto, “do as I say, not as I do” create a healthy and productive environment? I haven’t. A leader is meant to do exactly that, lead! How can you expect to get to your destination of success and reach your goals if you’re leading in the wrong direction, or worse, not leading at all?
So where do you go from here? What do you do if you feel like it’s time to grow as a leader and get your emotional intelligence together? Pssssst, there’s always room for improvement!
Well, there’s good news! It may not be easy, but it is totally possible to grow in this area of your life. So get to know yourself! Ask yourself questions about yourself and be honest with your answers. Practice telling yourself no; or practice saying yes if you never do. Find the balance between leading with your head and your heart. And know that being self-aware doesn’t mean stepping outside of yourself. Be intentional about meeting others with empathy and love. Side note, you should also meet yourself with empathy and love; shaming yourself won’t help you grow. Also, put work into your relationships with others and facilitate healthy interactions and connections with those around you. Now is this a list of steps to take that’s going to fix all of your problems? No. But it’s a start, and all we can do is try our best and strive to be better!
When you’ve done these things. When you’ve put in the work, you will see the transformation. And so will others; people notice even when you don’t think they do. You’ll see a more positive standard set in your workplace, you’ll improve your communication, defusing conflicts will become easier, adversity won’t be the end all be all. And beyond all of these wonderful changes you’ll also be able to grow your quality people and keep them with you; therefore also growing your business.
Being emotionally intelligent isn’t just a way to improve your life and your workplace, it’s a smart business plan. When you and your employees are doing better your business does better.
You are capable of change. You are capable of the hard things that lead to great rewards. I challenge you to start somewhere today. If you don’t know where to start just simply ask yourself what you want and why that is.
Evaluate where you are at a standstill and get out of your own way.
